Why?

A church worker was killed together with three of his four young sons on the way back to Malacca from Muar. He was survived by his dear wife and his one month old son. The wife, still in trauma, was said to be muttering and blaming herself during the past few nights after the accident. I read all about it in the papers. Later a dear friend called me and asked me why must good people die. A very good question. She knew this man personally. He was doing a great work helping some prisoners in a Muar prison.

This sad episode triggered off some recollections in my life. I was also involved in a messy car accident where the on-coming speeding car lost control and came crashing into me. The F1-wannabe car broke into two pieces. I was told the driver died after some days in the hospital. Well, I survived. Life becomes so precious. Even the nasi lemak becomes tastier. Squabbles, being misunderstood and being victimised have all but become non issues at all. There is no point waiting for "pay-back" time. There is no point spending sleepless nights because someone wronged me. If God has so graciously extended my life some six years ago, I will live this life to the fullest. No wonder Jesus said " I came so that everyone would have life, and have it in its fullest". Life is short, don't waste it. :)

Letting go ...

What a junk! Stacks and stacks of lecture notes dated back to the early eighties during my Uni days. Along with these are my Bible studies materials which I kept. I have been hoarding these items. Somehow there is this reluctant feeling to sell all these treasures to the "old newspaper man". These stack of papers have captured those moments of student life - both sweet and bitter. Somehow they have become a part of me. They have stayed with me for more than twenty years. Twenty years seemed so long.

Yet the duration of time seems irrelevant. A lovely double-layered green jacket was taken away at the JB custom check point. The custom officer said that army attire was not allowed into Malaysia. I was pretty sore as this was something that I treasured. It was a gift to me from a Singaporean friend. I was troubled by this incident for a pretty long while. The officer simply wanted the jacket for himself.

Eighteen years of service. A long time. Somehow this service has became a part of me. I decided the time has come for someone else to do it. A tough decision.



Letting go. God has been teaching me this valuable lesson to let go and let God.

Aiyo... I want to make my life count for God and man!

My heart ached to see him suffering on the hospital bed. He was gasping for air. Doctors had not been too encouraging. Our two little darlings were missing him so much as he wasted away. In spite of his terrible state of health, he offered his help to neighbouring Ah Pek's son. He pointed with much difficulty to a plastic bag filled with the old man's belongings, lying on the floor. He meant well, wanting to the son to store the bag safely in a cabinet. It was a known thing that belongings or even food could easily gone missing in the ward. That was my dear Abang. He was always so caring and loving. He would take our little darlings around on his motorbike. He would laugh and make us laugh. Things had changed. Even with the oxygen mask, he seemed deprived of air. Sometimes he would open his eyes and try to tell me so many things. He should not have gone on his own motorbike to massage his leg. I was happy to see him recovering from an accident some four months back. Who would have thought that life could be so cruel to us? He had been a careful man. How could another accident happened to him on the way for the massage? Had we done anything wrong? Abang's breath became more frantic and short. Then he stopped breathing. I called for the nurses. They arrived promptly but there was nothing much they could do. He was no more.

(*** Note from the blogger: This was a recent experience that I encountered while looking after my father in the Soga Government Hospital. The loving pair was only in their early twenties. Accident happened when the husband was riding out from his kampung. ***)